I was nominated by Hiba for the #GirlLove Challenge. Hiba is an inspiring, brave woman. I love reading her haunting poetry and appreciate her honesty in her slice of life, nonfiction posts.
So, the #GirlLove Challenge was challenge was originated by Lilly Singh to help eliminate girl on girl hate.
My husband watched the video with me, and he asked why girl on girl hate exists. I thought about it and realized it starts when we’re little girls. And I hate to admit it, some may disagree, but I think it’s worse among us brown girls. The most hurtful comments I’ve ever heard about my appearance or personality were from the mouth of another brown girl. We are picked apart because of our appearance starting when we’re toddlers. Who has the lightest skin, the longest hair, the best hair texture, the smaller nose, the lightest eyes. We are taught to compete with each other and compare ourselves to one another from an early age. I still notice it. Girls with features that society has deemed more favorable are singled out and praised while their counterparts look on, completely ignored. Don’t do this. Please don’t. Compliment girls on things besides just their looks. Tell them they’re loving, happy, smart, funny, charming, inventive, imaginative, etc. And if you do compliment them on their looks, compliment EVERY little girl in the group on their features, not just one. This breeds jealousy and bitterness among girls that blossoms into bullying and hurtful words once they’re tweens and teens, developing further into mean-spirited competition once they are fully grown women. There are women much older than me who I still hear make unflattering comments about fellow women and it just makes me so sad.
When someone makes a nasty comment about another woman’s appearance, shut it down. Change the subject, call them on it, or, if that doesn’t work, leave. Let them know that your world is a positive space.
Anyway, here’s what you do for the #GirlLove Challenge:
Tell your followers who inspires you, a famous woman who may be dealing with negativity on a daily basis.
Tell your followers who inspires you in real life, a woman you always interact with.
Tag five women bloggers who you love. Compliment them and tell them why you love them, and comment under their latest post with the link to your #GirlLove post!
- A famous woman who inspires me is Maya Angelou. I was so saddened to learn of her passing. She wrote stunning poetry that always gives me the confidence boost I need when I’m feeling unsure of myself. The best of her work in my opinion is Phenomenal Woman.
- My mother inspires me everyday. She has a quiet dignity that I know I will never be able to replicate. She has taught me that you don’t have to be the loudest or brashest woman in the room to command respect or attention, and to always take the high road. I try to do that everyday, even though I fail many times.
- The bloggers I would like to tag are:
- Pancake Bunnykins at A Real Messy Beautiful Twisted Sunshine
- Annie at What the Woman Wrote (I know this is your millionth nomination – you have to stop being so awesome!)
- Alixa at AlixAnonyme
- Cherrytato at CherryTales
All of you ladies are such talented writers, very different but beautiful and inspiring in different ways. By all means, anyone, regardless of if someone nominates or not, if you feel inspired by the challenge, please write your own post as well. Spread the #GirlLove!