Character

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The room was spinning.  The cheesy green disco lights on the dance floor seemed to whip around her at a dizzying pace.  One last dance and she’d go.   She’d been saying that for the past hour, but this time she meant it.  She didn’t trust herself around this gorgeous man.  Not after all the drinks she had.  She didn’t even know his last name.  She knew nothing of his personal history, his likes and dislikes.  His character.  Just that he was beautiful. And a great dancer.

He whispered something in her ear and she leaned her head back and laughed just as the room exploded. Flashes of fire, screaming, people running for cover, cries of suffering, hands over bleeding wounds.  He crumpled to the floor and she knelt beside him, his white shirt drenched with red.

“Go.  Just go,” he whispered, giving her hand a slight squeeze.  She kissed his still-warm cheek and crawled for the back exit, weeping for a man whose last name she’d never learn.

For Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers

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15 comments on “Character

  1. Great story Jenn and so topical with the Orlando shootings recently. Very descriptive and lot of emotion!

  2. luckyjc007 says:

    Great suspense, sad ending. He may have been just the type of person she was looking for.

  3. Wow. Powerful story, full of great imagery.

  4. mandibelle16 says:

    Powerful piece Jenn. And so pertinent. At first I thought, maybe she just thinks this man is gorgeous because she’s drunk, we!ve all been there . . . But my thoughts quickly changed, such sorrow and wandering or what could never be. Sadness, and parallels with the Florida shooting. People get so lost; people get so selfish. Well written.

    • Jenn says:

      Thanks. Yes, I was just wondering what it felt like to be having the time of your life and then watch something like this happen out of the blue. That must be how the people in the Orlando nightclub must have felt.

  5. Alka says:

    Touching story! The moment they got sure of what they want, was also the moment they became aware they had lost it forever.

  6. afairymind says:

    A very topical story, Jenn. The events in Orlando were horrifying and you capture that perfectly. People out for an evening, having fun and worrying simply about whether they’re too drunk to resist a handsome stranger, changing in the space of a moment to blood and fear. Very well done.

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