Hakuna Matata

“Hey there!  Minor disaster over here.  The baby is getting a rash and I was wondering what brand of diapers you think I should use?”

“Hmmm…well, my sister uses cloth diapers and loves them, no rashes.”

“Really???  That’s awesome.  But doesn’t all the washing get annoying…”

“Not sure.  I’ve never heard her complain.”

“What does she use for formula?  Sammy has so many allergies.”

“She breastfeeds exclusively, I think.”

“Oh, I’d love to do that for Sammy, but my milk never came in.  I worked with that lactation consultant in the hospital till I was practically raw…”

“Wow…”

What is that smell?!  Oh, Sammy!  I just changed you!   Could you hold for a moment?”

Before the person on the line could protest, the phone was put down.  Hakuna Matata, the famous song the meerkat and the warthog sing to Simba in The Lion King, could be heard the background as little Sammy’s diaper was quickly changed, his mother narrating the entire operation in graphic detail.

“Okay, I’m back.  That was a nasty one…soooooooooooo where were we?  Breastfeeding!   Could you recommend a good lactation consultant?”

“I can’t ma’am, and I have to clear the line.  911 is for emergencies only.”

 

For Flash Fiction for the Purposeful Practitioner

Read more about nuisance 911 calls here.

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20 comments on “Hakuna Matata

  1. Annie says:

    That last line killed it! 😂

  2. Haha! Great twist as usual. 🙂

  3. Hiba says:

    Oh no, haha, good one, Jenn 😂

  4. mandibelle16 says:

    Cute. Poor stressed mother.

  5. The Voice says:

    Nice twist Jenn. I’ve heard of some pretty bizarre 911 calls. I think one lady called because the fast food restaurant she was at didn’t get her order right. Sigh… Funny story, btw.

  6. Dorah A. K. says:

    I hear 911 operators have to deal with the strangest “emergencies”! This probably really happened somewhere 🙂

    • Jenn says:

      Probably so! My favorite is the one where the lady called because her favorite fast food place was out of chicken nuggets. Nutty! Thanks for reading.

  7. Lynn Love says:

    Haha! Very good. I remember having conversations like that when my son was born – not with emergency services though! Nicely done Jennifer

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