Runaways

My first time submitting a story for Sunday Photo Fiction!  I love these writing challenges.  So much fun!

road-by-night-1542268-1279x852

“Hitchhike?”  Amanda asked incredulously.

“Yep,” Taylor responded.  “I’ve done it tons of times.”

“I don’t believe you.”  Amanda and Taylor, best friends and neighbors since 2nd grade, were running away.   Amanda’s parents were unbelievably strict.  And Taylor’s mom’s brain was so fried she probably wouldn’t even notice she was gone for a few days.  Why stay?

“Okay, maybe not tons of times.  But I’ve done it.”

They arrived at the main road, the truck stop/gas station that faced their subdivision was well-lit and bustling despite the late hour.

“Come on, I’ll show you how easy it is.”

Amanda waited out front while Taylor went to the back parking lot to find a driver willing to take them to the next town.  She was back within minutes.

“I found a guy, but we need to leave now.”

“Tay…I don’t think this is a good idea.   What if…”

“Amanda, come onnnnnn.”

“It’s too dangerous.  Let’s just walk.”

“That’ll take hours.  Someone might see us!”

“No.”  Amanda took a step back.  Her decision was final.

A big rig drove past, blaring its horn.  “Fine, stay.  I’m getting out of here.”

“Taylor, no!!!”  Amanda grabbed Taylor’s arm, but she shook her off, causing her to fall in the gravel.  She stood to see Taylor blowing her a kiss from the open cab window.  Amanda ran after it as long as she could, screaming for Taylor, until it rounded a curve and disappeared.

Advertisements

16 comments on “Runaways

  1. luckyjc007 says:

    Good story. 🙂 Doing things on impulse is not always a good thing, especially in this case. Amanda made the right decision, but too bad she couldn’t stop Taylor from going.

  2. Joy Pixley says:

    Nice dialogue — and you definitely get the sense that this one conversation might be a turning point in both of their lives. Sounds like Amanda’s parents might have good reason for being so strict, if she hangs out with someone who’s such a bad influence — and someone who would abandon her best friend so readily.

    • Jenn says:

      Thank you! Dialogue is something I struggle with sometimes, so I really appreciate your feedback.

      • Joy Pixley says:

        I think most of us struggle with dialogue. But this comes across as believable for the age of the characters. Too often I see adults writing teenagers talking like middle-aged people… does *not* work.

  3. Great first submission! I should really do some myself (though I do enjoy reading everyone else’s!).

  4. Dangerous! I’m afraid she is going to find herself in a pickle! Great story!

  5. ceayr says:

    Good piece, well constructed and believable.
    And I do like an open ending.

  6. Eek that could go horribly wrong. Great story, I enjoyed that.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s