Writing 201 Day One – The Dark is Best For Hiding

These girls are my friends. We’re sitting in a circle on the ground.  It’s early.  The grass is cold.    I don’t mind.  I like to be outside.  It’s recess.  I like recess too.  And now I have five new friends.  I just counted them in my head.  And today is my fifth day here.  Five is a good number.  My new favorite number.  Half of ten, which used to be my favorite number.

My friends are standing, so I stand too.  They all start to run.  I’m not a fast runner, but I try to keep up with them.  They sit on the other side of the playground in a circle.  The circle is smaller this time.  I try to fit, and I almost do.  I sit next to the girl with blue eyes.  Blue is my favorite color.  Her hair is black and in two pigtails, just like mine.  She’s my favorite.  But I won’t say that out loud, just in my head, because I don’t want to be rude.  She and the other girls are talking in quiet voices.  She looks at me and whispers again.  My mom says whispering is rude, it makes other people feel left out.  I want to know what they are saying, so I try and scoot closer.

She turns and looks at me.  She talks louder now, so I can hear.  She’s not being rude any more.  She tells me they are going to play a game, hide and seek.  I smile.  I watched the other kids out of my window at my old house play that all the time.  They were always smiling and laughing and running.  Once a girl was hiding behind a tall bush in our backyard.  I saw her run behind our house.  I watched her hide.  No one found her for a long, long time.  I saw her smile.  She was happy that no one could find her.  She knew that meant she was good at the game.  A boy came looking for her.  He walked around and around our yard, looking and looking.  She jumped out and yelled “boo!”  He jumped and yelped, then they both laughed and laughed.  It looked so fun.  I wanted to play too.  But mom said I couldn’t go outside.

I get up and run to hide.  I’ll find the best hiding spot.  There’s a big empty box on the side of the school.  It’s big enough to cover me.  I pull it over my head and squat down.  When she comes looking, I’ll jump up and yell “boo!”  She’ll scream and laugh and so will I, and we’ll run back inside together.  It’s dark inside the box but I don’t mind.  I like the dark.  It’s best for hiding.

Very Inspiring Blogger Awards . . .

 

Very Inspring Blogger Award

I’m normally a very shy girl, not comfortable with praise, but I am beyond flattered to be nominated by Ronovan for the Very Inspiring Blogger award.  Thank you so much!

The rules for the nominees are:

  1. Thank and link to the amazing person who nominated you.
  2. List the rules and display the award.
  3. Share seven facts about yourself.
  4. Nominate 15 other amazing blogs and comment on their posts to let them know they have been nominated.
  5. Proudly display the award logo on your blog and follow the blogger who nominated you.

Sooo, seven facts about me hmmm, as yet unrevealed…

1. I read ravenously, probably not much of a surprise.  The last book I read was Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell.  I found myself missing the characters after I was done, wondering what they would be up to now.  Sign of a great book.

2.  I once missed a day of work to finish watching season 2 of House of Cards (shhh….).

3.  My favorite movie is The Princess Bride.

4.  Robin Wright is one of my favorite actresses (obviously, see 2 and 3).

5.  I always wanted to write a mystery novel, working on one right now, based in my current hometown of Norcross, GA.  Hopefully it will be done by the end of the year.

6.  I learned more about writing during the past month than I have in my entire life.  I’m surprised at how easily I’ve taken to blogging.

7.  If I don’t have a new book to read, I feel empty.  Thankfully I have a new one on the way from Amazon, a guilty pleasure beach book to take to the lake this summer, The Heiresses by Sara Shepard.

I’m new to the blogosphere, so I’m going to nominate the blogs I’ve read that have touched or inspired me during the past month and a half or so;

Embracing a Wounded Soul

Ronovan Writes

Round the World

Love Always, Sarah

Saying It Aloud

 

Bound

I want to take you off

Scrub your stench from my skin

But I still wear the shame

That should belong to you

 

Did you know I am you?

Your mother

Your sister

Your daughter

Your wife

 

Or was I just a shell

A vessel for your hate

You’ll never touch me again

But your darkness lingers

I want to take you off

 

I’m so glad reading this blog gave me the courage to share this very personal poem I wrote a while ago:

http://ronovanwrites.wordpress.com/2014/07/08/sexual-abuse-and-the-damage-it-brings-an-interview-with-honua-nani/

Girls’ Girl or Mean Girl?

“If you’re a girl, you should naturally be predisposed to other women. That’s just the way it is. You should be sharing your experiences with other women.” – Chelsea Handler

Easier said than done, Chelsea, easier said than done.  Most of the women I’ve met who are self-described “girls’ girls” have been the meanest, most judgemental, exclusionary people I’ve ever met.  If you identify as a “girls’ girl” the question really is are you really just a good old-fashioned mean girl in disguise?

mean girls

Allow me to explain.  I think the term “girls’ girl” is a little silly, I mean we’re all girls, but for the sake of this exercise, let’s go with it.  I think there are a few core differences that set mean girls apart from the rest of the female population.  First, they’re exclusionary.  If you’re at an event at a table full of your closest girlfriends, and a woman walks in that clearly is by herself and doesn’t know anyone, do you, go up and introduce yourself, maybe help her find a seat, or even invite her to sit down with you until her friend arrives, or do you and your friends whisper about her dress and shoes and hair and avert your eyes when she longingly glances at the one empty chair at your table?  I think a true girls’ girl is supportive and welcoming to ALL women, not just her nearest and dearest.  Of course it’s fine to have an inner circle of besties, but you should never be so closed off that you can’t make room at your table, literally and figuratively.  Who knows what you might learn.

“Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don’t.” – Bill Nye

 

you can't sit with us

From the tv show New Girl:

Jess: One time a girl said to me, “Jess, you rock a lot of polka dots.”

Gina: Ooh, how did she say it?

Jess: “Jess, you rock a LOT of polka dots…”

Cece: Diabolical.

They’re judgmental. We’re all individuals.  Some of us prefer a classic look, some are more contemporary, others are self-described hippies that scour the racks at secondhand shops (me!).  Individuality is what makes the world a beautiful place.  Who wants to live on a planet where every person walking down the street is dressed and styled the exact same way?  You know who?  Mean girls!  Now, it’s one thing to take a friend to the side and tell her she has spinach in her teeth, or a stain on her blouse, or to alert of her of a major wardrobe malfunction, that’s just being a supportive friend, but when you expect all of your friends to match your style, or dictate to them what they should and shouldn’t be wearing each time you go out, you’re not being helpful, you’re squashing their personality.  You don’t want a friend, you want a clone.  Technology hasn’t quite caught up with you yet.  Try and admire each of your friends’ unique looks, even if they don’t share your taste, and unless a nip has slipped, keep your mouth shut.

zooey-deschanel-kate-spade

They can dish it but can’t take it.  A true friend gives honest but dependable advice whenever it’s needed.  Even when a bit of constructive tough love when is called for, they’re still your soft place to fall.  A mean girl  doles out heavy doses of brutal “advice” all the time, usually unsolicited, about every aspect of your life, including sensitive topics like your diet and exercise routine (or lack thereof), or your parenting style and romantic relationships, but never accepts advice when its offered to her.  She’s ALWAYS right, the world is in desperate need of HER illustrious wisdom.  If you dare stand up to her, you will feel the full heat of her fury,  likely in the form of an all-out screaming meltdown.  Or, if she’s really diabolical, she will  slowly and methodically turn everyone in your life against you, leaving you dazed and alone, wondering what the heck just happened.

diabolical

So, if you are one of the few people that read this blog 🙂 and you think someone in your inner circle meets the mean girl criteria, sit down and have a discussion with her.

one time she punched

If she’s not willing to change – my constructive advice – run like the wind in the other direction.  And if you see yourself in my words, and you’re willing to listen, be a little easier on your friends, and make some room at popular girls’ table.